Lunar or Looney?

SingleBFF wants everyone to know that she isn't really a moron.

Now that I have added the disclaimer I can tell you about last night.

SingleBFF came over to watch AIdol and the lunar eclipse. She was going on and on about having never seen one before. When I took her to grab some food (it was a non-cooking sorta night), she reminded me every ten minutes that we had to look outside at 8:28 PM.

In the middle of watching our shows, I decided I better find out exactly what time it was to start. Past experiences told me to verify her information. My instincts were right, she had seen the start time in Eastern - we are Central. I rushed outside to find the shadow was already halfway across the moon.

"Hurry, get out here!" I called to her, but when she got outside her excitement deflated.

"This isn't it. It is suppose to be really bright flashing lights."

I gave her my standard what-are-you-talking-about looks. I frequently hand them out to her.

"An eclipse isn't bright lights." You would think after three years of hanging out she would come to realize I am always right, but no, she argued with me

"Yes, I saw it on the news. Flashing lights, it is supposed to flash."

I couldn't contain myself. It was hard to laugh in zero degree weather. She immediately went into defense mode and launched into countless reasons how she knew what she was talking about. It took me three interruptions and a SHUT UP FOR A MINUTE before she would listen to me.

Eclipse - shadow - moon, earth, sun alignment - she looked like a deer in headlights. She didn't really care about a shadow. She sat at my window the rest of the night waiting for flashing. What a gooberhead. She still swears she saw flashing lights on the news. My best guess is they showed a clip of a time elapsed eclipse. When I approached her with the theory her flashing lights were merely glitches in a recording of an eclipse, she blew me off.

Teenagers! LOL, I wonder what her excuse will be when she hits twenty . . .

-Sara

Family Fibs and Fun

I got chewed out yesterday for not having my phone charged. Seems everyone was trying to get a hold of me about a family get together planned for tonight. Here is the thing - today is the one year anniversary of my father's death. Call me crazy, but I am not that interested in turning the 16th into a holiday. As a huge number geek I usually notice, but I refuse to attach negative emotions with a day of the month. I was hoping for an uneventful day of cleaning and laundry. I can celebrate my dad on his birthday next month.

Here is how it went down - my sister caught me on instant messenger late last night. She was whining about my phone and then told me to call my brother. She claimed everyone was concerned about MomL, and we needed to have a hangout night to keep her from being alone. The hiccup was MomL didn't want to play hostess, and my brother didn't want it at his house unless I could come.

WHAT? I mean I am AMAZING, but really? This whole plan hinges on me? Is anyone else buying this crap? I don't think so. I tried explaining I was not interested in having a tribute night, but if it was important to the rest of them, I would go. Lastly I had to tell my sister fourteenth times that I would call bro, and I knew she still didn't believe me, but I signed off the instant messenger anyway.

Not five minutes pass and my brother calls me via Ryan's cell phone. Either he is the smart one in the family, or my sister tag teamed and gave him the heads up I was home.

He says the hangout night is all for my sister's sake. She is the one that gives us a call every 16th of the month making sure we realize what day it is. My brother confesses he told her it was about MomL so my sister would come, and fed her the line about it only being at his house if I go as a ploy to make sure someone contacted me since he wasn't having any luck.

Sheesh. Do all families work undercover?

In the end I went - kid free even, woohoo! - and had a good time. We talked so long about our bizarre idiosyncrasies, MomL was feeling normal and left out. My sister pointed out that anyone who would see the signs and still choose to marry into our world is crazy in their own right. She felt better.

And it didn't end up being a tribute night. Dad only came up a few times and no tears were involved. If I had known it was going to be that simple I wouldn't have put up a fuss. Oh well, lesson learned. Make the fuss afterward, not beforehand :)

-Sara

Why we love SingleBFF

Just a typical night watching Project Runway

SingleBFF - Why am I SO RETARDED!?!?!
MomBFF - Ooooo! Oooooo! (raising her hand)
Me - We ask ourselves that EVERYDAY
SingleBFF - I hate my life, shut up
MomBFF - that's why it is a bad idea when cousins marry
SingleBFF - what?
MomBFF - forget it
Me - she said, "that's why it is a bad idea when cousins marry"
SingleBFF - who are cousins?
MomBFF - your PARENTS
Single - my parents? are cous . . . no they aren't

By now we were laughing hysterically
SingleBFF - I don't understand
Me - What are you doing that makes you retarded?
SingleBFF - I can't figure out Oregon Trail
Hysterical laughter starts up
MomBFF - what's more retarded, that you are trying to play Oregon Trail, or that you can't figure it out?

While MomBFF and I tried to figure this out, SingleBFF answered for us:
"Geezuz, why isn't this working?"

And we still don't understand why she was playing Oregon Trail.

-Sara